meadowlark | @gaby

Entry tags:

@gaby

[ this was supposed to be one of Gaby's days off. in fact, she's not in the safehouse when the message comes in. ]

Turns out that we're missing two new faces around the safehouse.

I'd play a guessing game as to why I wasn't told, but I don't care. These two faces apparently murdered two people that night.

I don't know who they are, but I do know that they're locked up. Any guesses as to what's going to happen to them?

Genuine question. Because I don't know.

Oh, and because some of you think you can do whatever the hell you want around here: don't think the way out for them is a jail break. Don't even fucking try it. And no, Morningstar isn't in the business of breaking people out of jail, because that would be stupid.

[ she's a little angry. no. a lot. but mostly she doesn't know how to handle this one. ]

Look. You know something? Tell me. You won't be "in trouble."

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Then what?

[A sincere question. He wants to know.]

you tell me, markus
why would connor go out of his way to intentionally piss me off, when we haven't had any issues previously
he's a fucking android who worked as an investigator, programmed to integrate with people
it wasn't him getting pissy and reacting
it was him trying to get a rise

[...Well.]

You're right.

[Jason is absolutely right, able to see just what lies behind the curtain, not as well-hidden as Connor probably thought. The other android had even admitted that much to Markus in their own correspondence.

There's a beat, a moment without a reply, because he's trying to figure out the best way to proceed from here.]

But if you knew that, then why did you take the bait?

It isn't all cold calculation in order to make you look bad, all just a plot to make you seem "unfit". Android or not, programming or not, he's just as stressed as the rest of us; what he is and what he was made to do has no bearing on that.

He's worried about what might happen if we make the wrong move, if we do the wrong thing. He doesn't want innocent people to get hurt, and I know you don't either. But when someone has decided, strongly, to err on the side of caution, and that same someone sees talk of murder, of explosion used as distractions, of a multitude of risks that might compromise everyone here? It's frightening. And it's going to make him want to garner visible evidence as to why all of it is a bad idea, even if that evidence happens to be directed mostly at you as a person.

[Which is, admittedly, unfair. Connor might have gone a little too far in that direction, which is one of the reasons why Markus was eager to step in.]

He isn't doing it just to spite you.

discrediting any immediate action by discrediting me because he's right and everyone who thinks otherwise is wrong

( he gets it. would have taken the same path if jason was determined to go his own way--if needing assistance and approval was a concern. but. )

he wants to do it his way, fine. i don't give a shit. got nothing to do with me. if the "displaced" get compromised, it won't be on me.
i'm done.

[It's hard to play mediator. Harder to put out those fires that threaten to burn bridges. He just hopes that Jason understands, inherently, that-]

In the end, we all want the same thing. We all want to keep each other safe.

I'm here if you need to talk more.

[Otherwise, he'll let him blow off steam.]

( speaking of burning bridges-- )

i don't give a shit about any of you
i protect my own, fuck everyone else
if doing that means separating from the herd of idiots who protect losers who can't contain themselves for four fucking seconds without committing murder?
fine by me

[Oh boy. Here we go.]

That's running on assumption. We need more information. Two people are dead, yes, but those that committed the crime might have been acting out because of the drug, fear, or both. I can't condemn them just yet, not without knowing the full story.

[Because that hits too close to home. Reminds him of Leo blaming him for Carl's death, and him being so quickly broken and discarded because of it.]

But that's not the point. Are you really telling me you don't care at all for any of the others here? That you won't put in an effort to save or help them if they ever need it?

no
i won't help them. why would i? what have they done for me?
what the hell has connor done to deserve my help?
all he's done is piss me off, and i'm sick of it
him and everyone else
so i'm done
good luck handling shit

( maybe markus has a point with that first but this now goes beyond just the whole. uh. murder incident. )

[He's starting to feel the clench of a stress headache. He's so tired of this human body, but Markus wrings out every last drop of patience, refusing to let it run dry.

Emotions are running high all over the place. Markus doesn't believe Jason is nearly as selfish as that, that this is only the result of being prodded in the wrong way, concerning a tenuous situation that none of them know how to really approach.]

And what about you and I, our friendship? Or when you told me about attempting to fix the world, about how useless it is, but we try anyway? That sounded like someone who wanted to help others, to me.

( markus already has jason under his thumb. already knows him deeper than the surface level bullshit he spouts out when he's angry. upset. like this. he knows jason isn't the heartless monster he's trying to seem like he is.

which means jason just has to push the envelope further. this is so much easier over text. )

it's all bullshit.
we're not friends, you were just a convenience. knew how to stich me up and came when i called for you
guy with a bleeding heart like you? easiest way to keep you on a leash was to pretend i had one, too

[He knows to put so very little stock into any of this. Connor had already called him out on being self-destructive, and Markus thinks he’s witnessing this first hand, with all the pieces of explosive shrapnel directed at him this time. They still cut and sting — any emotional creature can’t be completely unaffected by words like that — but ever patient, ever trying to be steady while a storm swirls around him, Markus still replies calmly.]

I don’t believe that. Not at all.

[Plenty of others could have stitched him up. Hell, Markus would’ve aided him even if they were just two strangers that were unlikely to get along. Markus is helpful, yes, even possessing something of a bleeding heart — but he is equally stubborn, hard to keep on a ‘leash’ with his own brand of willful spirit. There are easier targets by far, if the point was manipulation. He knows that Jason must know that, too.]

Why are you pushing me away? If you need to time to breathe, or to detach yourself from this conversation, then just tell me. I’ll respect that.

Otherwise, I’m just trying to understand you.

( he hates this. hates how well markus reads between the lines. how well he knows jason todd, the man under the shitty half-assed masked he wears. how jason's trying his fucking best to get markus to lay off and markus--knows. knows he is intentionally being a jackass to push him away. to get markus to lay off.

because what it means is that jason does have to push harder. has to hurt him. has to tell him to fuck off in a way that sparks pain rather than the anger he's going for. markus doesn't get angry, easy. and jason hates relying on pain for shit like this. )

i told you about the pit, didn't i
how it burned everything away
it burned this shit away, too. caring for people. giving a damn
i just fake it to get by
i never gave a shit about you, markus. you're just another pretty face willing to lend a hand
and i'm fucking sick of seeing it

[Jason's trying to push the knife in. Markus knows it. The keenness of daggers being slung back at him, in the form of text messages popping up in his vision, will only become sharper and sharper the more he tries to slide under the surface of Jason's frustration, that core he keeps hidden from public view.

Even so? That's still harsh. It's still not easy to read.]

So that's all it took, then? Me trying to be reasonable with you, and suddenly you're tired of me? Suddenly it's all been nothing more than an act?

( he hates this so much. hates hurting markus, hates throwing people away. hates the kind of asshole he's becoming (again) how much he's hurting people who don't deserve it (again). and god, it hurts. aches deep in his heart, jason can't stand it. )

yep

[Markus could say so many things to that one-word answer. Could provide reasons why he doesn't believe that to be true at all, where the contradictions lie; that not caring would actually mean not reacting so stringently in this way, that if he had all of his empathy stripped from him, he'd not even pretend to give a whit about his own. Wouldn't have a made a post about one gone lost not that long ago.

And yet, like all good leaders, Markus knows how to pick and choose his battles. Even if he goes away stinging a little from the injuries.]

I still don't believe it. But I think now is also a good time to detach myself from this conversation. I'll give you a chance to cool down.

I'm a text away if you change your mind and want to continue this talk later.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

@gaby

private

private

private

private

private

private

private

private

private

private

private

private

private

private

private