Dr. Lance Sweets (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
lifetothefullest) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
meadowlark2020-11-02 11:43 am
lifetothefullest) wrote in meadowlark2020-11-02 11:43 am
@lance.sweets
For recent arrivals and anyone who missed it before, a few weeks ago I compiled what information I could find about our experienced here into a document. It needs to be updated with recent events, such as the offer from Riverstone, but should otherwise be mostly complete up to a short time ago. Like last time I posted this, if anyone has corrections or additional information, please let me know.
On a related note, I was wondering if anyone who's still here has met Johann Grey in person or otherwise seen him, and would be willing to share that memory with me. I just want to know what he looks like, not whatever experience you had with him (unless you want to go into that), so it could be as short of a memory as you'd like for it to be.
Similarly, I wanted to know if anyone met or saw images of the James Henries in Zerzura. I don't have any real reason to believe he isn't actually the same person, or at least versions of the same person, as the James Henries here, but it's still worth verifying.
For everyone who isn't particularly interested in or otherwise doesn't have input on the other things I mentioned, I have a different question. What's something that you wished that you knew when you first arrived here?
On a related note, I was wondering if anyone who's still here has met Johann Grey in person or otherwise seen him, and would be willing to share that memory with me. I just want to know what he looks like, not whatever experience you had with him (unless you want to go into that), so it could be as short of a memory as you'd like for it to be.
Similarly, I wanted to know if anyone met or saw images of the James Henries in Zerzura. I don't have any real reason to believe he isn't actually the same person, or at least versions of the same person, as the James Henries here, but it's still worth verifying.
For everyone who isn't particularly interested in or otherwise doesn't have input on the other things I mentioned, I have a different question. What's something that you wished that you knew when you first arrived here?
no subject
He considers Lance's instructions, glancing down to his lap. It would be a lie if he claimed he hadn't thought back on this particular memory, unpleasant as it might have been to be so thoroughly at someone else's mercy.
Really, Lance is making all sorts of concessions, trying to be as careful as possible. He seems to understand how much of an ask this is, and in truth, Jack would like to know what the process is like before doing it himself. ]
Yeah, why don't you share one first? I assume we have to touch.
[ The empathy bond must be a prerequisite for something like this, right? It usually is. He yanks his glove off of his left hand, then holds it out for Lance to take. ]
no subject
[Just as a warning, though he surely already guessed that. And despite suggesting this whole thing, Lance hesitates a moment; he'd had time to choose an easy, completely benign memory to share since their discussion the day before, but he still needs to take a brief moment to center himself mentally in preparation.
And, he should probably add--]
I know it's easier said than done, but try focusing on the here and now for the moment; if you're thinking about other memories and experience you may still share them by accident.
[Which is what Lance had done when he first used this power, though thankfully it had been an experience he didn't mind another person seeing.
And that warning given, and stalling accomplished, Lance reaches out to take Jack's offered hand. The empathy bond activates immediately, along with the glow, although the latter is hidden under Lance's hoodie.
From Lance's side, the empathy bond conveys some nervousness, curiosity, concern, and determination; he's focused on this whole task at hand, and it's drowning out any other emotions he might normally be feeling in the background. Right now this is all business, and so he isn't having to put too much effort into hiding anything he wouldn't want coming across.
And, a moment later, the memory starts. It's a brief experience and one that isn't particularly interesting, but that's the point of this practice session; Lance is at a store playing with a virtual keyboard that they have for sale. The sound is, of course, excellent--it's virtual, so craftsmanship of the instrument doesn't come into play too much--and it's responsive, the virtual keys acting just like physical ones even if the sensation of pressing only air is very different. The lack of delay between a key press and the resulting sound causes an adjustment of timing to be necessary, but Lance accounts for it in a second or two and is soon playing a simple piece, trying to get the hang of adding in the virtual foot pedal.
It's very weird, and although there's a faint undercurrent of frustrating at having to make adjustments--his skill in piano and physical keyboards isn't quite translating to this new virtual setup to the extent he might like with his perfectionism--he's still overall pretty pleased, the calming feeling of playing music combined with the little rush of being successful and the fun of the challenge all combine for a good memory.
Once it's done Lance breaks the connection so as to avoid any accidentally further memory transfers, and gives Jack a moment to process the whole experience.]
no subject
While Jack's made a point of avoiding the empathy bond whenever he can, he has gone through the unpleasant experience of sharing emotions with someone before. From his side, his uneasiness at this entire situation will come across first, but there will also be a desire for knowledge, and for what he went through on that exam table (and in the aftermath of the procedure) to mean something.
Soon enough the memory starts, surging across the bond and then into Jack's mind. It's a little bit like dreaming while awake, and the sensation of taking a ride in someone else's body, seeing what they see, feeling what they feel, is jarring to say the least.
The memory isn't anything special, but it does at least tell Jack that Lance enjoys playing the keyboard, or piano. A small and unimportant detail, but something that he notates all the same.
When Lance pulls back, Jack heaves out a sigh and shakes his head to clear it. Well, now he knows what he'll be putting Lance through when they try it the other way around, and he feels compelled to issue a warning. ]
— You probably already guessed as much, but this isn't going to be pleasant.
[ So, if Lance wanted to back out, here was his chance. Somehow, though, Jack doesn't think that's going to happen. ]
no subject
But Jack seems okay, and then his first comment is to offer a warning, and Lance gives a small genuine smile.]
I appreciate the warning.
[And more specifically, he appreciates that Jack cared to give it, especially since this experience will surely be far worse for him than for Lance. He doesn't expect the memory to be fun, by any means, but it also isn't something that happened to him.
And, just as Jack is suspecting--]
But I think this is important enough to be worth it, though only if you want to continue.
[He wants to give Jack the same chance to change his mind, just in case that he wants to do so now that he has a better idea of what it might be like.]
no subject
So he nods, confirming that he does want to continue, and then reaches forward to take Lance's hand again. His unease has been partially replaced with steely determination, and soon after that, the memory begins to play out across their bond.
It's more like a series of memories, starting with the trip to the undisclosed location where the surgery was performed, the holographic projection with Johann's introduction (which it turns out is the clearest look that Jack actually got of the guy), and then —
Waking up mid-surgery. Not being able to see. The controlled panic will be something that Lance feels as well, for all that Jack had done his best to keep his cool and ask whatever questions he could think of in the moment to get something of use out of Grey.
And, well, there had been some interesting details. With one sense removed in the memory, the others almost seem amplified, each of Johann's words dripping with purpose.
"As far as Cassius and I go—well, that's a story that goes back to just after the Xelkoven War..."
And it continues, through Jack's frustration when he realized that this entire operation was for nothing, ending when he became hazy with the anesthetic again and eventually went unconscious once more.
As soon as it ends, Jack pulls away, blinking a few times as he takes in the room around them with renewed interest. He'll never take his ability to see for granted again, that's for sure. ]
no subject
It's a weird feeling, to see another person's memories, to experience something that's already happened to someone completely different and yet feel as if its something in your own life playing out for the first time.
In some ways the memories aren't as bad as he might've been prepared for; his imagination can run a bit wild, and with a likely malicious egocentric scientist doing brain surgery there's very little limit as to what could go wrong. But in other ways they're worse; there's a big difference between imagining what could happen and actually going through it, and there are so many horrible parts to it--being awake during a surgery of any kind, the cavalier and far too personal way Johann talks and behaves, ending up blind--and even after the memory stops it's overwhelming for a moment, requiring Lance to several seconds to mentally clear up where and when he is.
But in the midst of that, something else has clicked into place, and that makes this all worth it. Johann looks exactly how Lance had theorized he might, and even though that had been the point of this whole line of investigation some part of him is still utterly shocked by it.
Once they've both had a chance to recover a moment, and Lance is sure he can put words together without his voice shaking, he breaks the silence first.]
Thank you. I know that can't have been easy, and I'm sorry you had to go through it and then relive it, but I hope you'll find it to be worth it.
[And instead of sharing memories again--it isn't necessary and they both could probably use the break--he sends the images of Henries he found to Jack's inbox, though they're purposefully devoid of identifiers.]
What do you think?
[He's purposefully vague, not wanting to say if Jack should think they're pictures of Johann that Lance somehow has, or if it's someone else who, despite being older, bears a very striking resemblance.]